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Valentine's Day with Sarcasm

It’s no secret. I’ve never been a big fan of Valentine’s Day. Maybe it’s the cliched phrases and puns, the teddy bears and lingerie, or the fact that it preys on estrogen ... I don't know what it is, but it's never been my favorite.


Some people might think this lets my husband off the hook, and in some ways you might be right. But in others, not so much.


You see, I want him to show me love 365 days a year, not just on February 14th. But I'm not talking about lavish gifts and romantic overtures (however nice those may be). I'm talking about loving me in sweatpants, sleep deprivation, colonoscopies, childbirth, and quarantine!


That's the kind of Valentine's Day worth celebrating. Only Hallmark doesn't write cards for REAL LIFE, so I created my own!



Here are the themes you can choose from:


There's sarcasm and love wrapped up in each one of these cards (because in my opinion, laughter is spicier than chocolate).


So pick one or pick them all. Give them to your man on Valentine's Day ... or don't. (Maybe just give him this meme instead.)



And don’t think I forgot the kids - they get mini Valentine's Day cards too! These aren't sarcastic, though, as I realize it takes awhile for good humor to mature. Click HERE to download.


Print these cards off and put one in your favorite child's lunchbox (don't pretend you like each kid equally 😉). Maybe even encourage your son or daughter to give a card to someone in the neighborhood or at school. After all, the only thing better than receiving love is spreading it, right? Unless you're spreading brie.



Really my point is simple: love is squishy. It's not chiseled abs and taut glutes. It's more like spanx and dark chocolate. Even so, it deserves to be commemorated every day of the year, so our kids don't grow up thinking love is like Santa Claus -- something that comes once a year.



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